Maybe that's why these authors didn't even bother to try. Some of these 'titles' barely even deserve the noun. Which is a shame, because the fanfics under these terrible titles are some of the best works that most people may never read because of their vastly misleading titles.
1. Loki is a little shit for the nth time but that’s what we’re all here for, so, eh, fuck it. P.S. there’s also porn by thisdorkyficthing - Thor/Avengers fandoms, slash, Thor/Loki pairing, AU, mpreg
Guilt bubbled up in his belly, not for the first time since he decided he needed to find a way to get out of Jotunheim permanently, but it was worse now that his plans seemed to be falling into place. For all his faults, Loki loved his father and knew he had his reasons to try and shelter him. Loki felt bad about having to trick him, but he’d never let Loki go otherwise.
Asgard was going to be his home. Whether anyone else liked it or not.
The 'title' of this story makes it sound like it is pure crack and porn, and while there is some of that for sure, that is by far not all. For one thing, it's over 80,000+ words long! It's about love and families, acceptance and an end to war, and making a life together. There's romance, angst, action, and of course lots of hilarity and hot sex. Well worth the read!
2.Thor & Family's Camping Adventures Part II, In Which They Actually Do Some Camping by 5ofSpades - Thor fandom, slash, Thor/Loki pairing, AU, slavery, kidfic
In Which Asa-Thor, his frost giant slave Loki, and their family go on a road/camping trip across the realms, meeting the colourful cast of the Poetic Edda along the way.
aka How the Poetic Edda was mutilated by a ThunderFrost fic, complete with illustrations.
Another Thorki fic, yes, but another not to be missed. This epic saga is just that, an epic and a saga - in the classical sense! This story basically takes every scrap of Norse mythology ever and brings it to life with beautiful illustrations and equally engrossing writing. The story itself is technically a sequel to how Thor 'acquired' his slave!Loki in the first place, but as they move on to living essentially as a married couple the slavery warning is pretty mild.
What's utterly amazing about this fic though is how much detail and research obviously went in to it. I don't know if the author is actually a Norse scholar or what, but if they'd submitted this fic as their thesis I would be handing them their degree with a smile!
3. Love's a Battlefield (and the Navy Did Not Train Steve for This Shit) by cyerus - Hawai'i 5-O fandom, Steve/Danny pairing, slash
The Kalakaua-Kelly clan have gotten it into their heads that they need to matchmake Steve. Out of desperation, Steve makes up a boyfriend named Danny.
It doesn't quite go according to plan. (12,488 words)
Honestly, neither the title nor the summary of this fic would have made me read it. But thankfully my introduction to it was from a rec by rageprufrock that included the following snippet:“Listen,” Steve says desperately, “I need to you come to this thing with me because I told them you’d be there, and Kono’s mom, she will kill me if I show up alone, kill me in front of thirty cops, and none of them will say anything because she is that intimidating, do you understand?”
Williams stares at him, mouth half-open in astonishment.
Steve nearly whines as his phone beeps with another incoming text, and he doesn’t have to look at it to know it’s along the lines of, this isnt funny steve she will kill you with fire. “Can we just go? I’ll explain more on the way.”
“No,” Williams says slowly, “no, I get it. You made up a boyfriend to get out of some kind of family obligation, possibly because you’re an idiot, more likely because you have the emotional maturity of a hyena that thinks snatching people off the street is a socially acceptable way to ask someone out. But now everything’s coming back to bite you in the ass, and you need me to play Danny the loving partner so you can keep sitting on your throne of lies.”
“That’s...exactly it, yeah.” Steve gazes down at Williams in surprise, and not a little paranoia. “How did you know that?”
4. The One Where They're Forced To Marry In Ye Olden Times by Stoney - Teen Wolf fandom, slash, Derek/Stiles pairing, AU
Due to the destruction of House Hale and the debts incurred in their survival and search for justice, the King (blah blah, make believe world) arranges a marriage between Derek and Stiles, eliminating all debts the Hales may owe. Derek is very unhappy. Stiles is pretty shocked at who he's being matched with, but he's certainly not unhappy. It's pretty clear from the start Derek doesn't share that feeling.
Stiles passes the time by hunting with his falcon, Derek broods. Until...
Crappy bodice-ripper title for an amazingly angsty arranged-marriage fic. Sure, it's not what I'd call slow burn since the entire fic takes place over a single week, but a lot of development happens during that week. It's definitely not all tropes and rainbows. That's what I liked best about it though, that this story even if spurred by a trashy romance plotline still took the time to do the trope seriously and write a decent, quality fic. Nice!
5. How (thanks to Gabriel) Dean and Castiel (accidentally) raised each other (and Sam). by Vera (Vera_DragonMuse) - Supernatural fandom, slash, Dean/Cas & Sam/Gabriel pairings, AU, timetravel, kidfic
In which, Gabriel meddles with the time line and Castiel becomes Dean's angel rather sooner than intended.
Okay, the title is at least accurate if underwhelming. But it utterly fails to do the fic justice! Almost 70,000 words long, this fantastic story rewrites canon from a young age all the way up. It's smart, full of heart and love and angst and hurt/comfort. It's about family and brothers and friends and trust. Gabriel had no clue what the consequences of his actions would be, but I think in the end he's well pleased by how things turned out. I certainly was.
6. Oolon Colluphid Was Right by melannen - Stargate: Atlantis fandom, gen, crack, meta
The Stargates' universal translation effect can sometimes make secret communication in enemy territory difficult. Luckily, Rodney has a plan.
Pop-culture saves the day! Or what happens when geeks (aka John and Rodney) talk only in a code of geekish cultural references that most of us readers, let alone the hostile Pegasus natives, don't have a hope of understanding! I only picked up about 85% of the meanings myself (Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra!) but what I could make out was fun and hilarious. It's an exercise in linguistics and translation, scifi geekery and metaphor, and cultural expressionism. The title, while non-sensical on its own, is definitely a key part of that!
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